Or maybe it should be – “Why Satan would be more powerful that God, if deities actually existed”.

Someone dropped this image into the show notes for Nothing Serious last night, and while we didn’t get to mention it, I think it makes excellent fodder for this site.

Christmas History with Tha Lord:

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire:

Early Christians lived in the ̶s̶h̶i̶t̶h̶o̶l̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶g̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶I̶s̶r̶a̶e̶l̶ desert region of Israel, where there was not much food to be found, because it was a ̶s̶h̶i̶t̶h̶o̶l̶e̶ desert. They frequently collected nuts, because they have a high caloric value. Roasting them on an open fire reduced the ̶s̶h̶i̶t̶t̶y̶ bitter flavor of said nuts. Chestnuts contain a compound called faithisin, a hallucinogenic compound that causes delusions of grandeur and a cognitive disconnect between cause and effect. The early Christians were predisposed to ignorance, because legitimate science had not yet taken hold in the region. Combined with the effects of faithisin found in roasted chestnuts, the early Christians generated elaborate stories surrounding the month of December that have no basis in fact. Thus, Christian tradition not only includes nuts, but actually is nuts.

Wait until you see the fine print!

When the Bible was being cobbled together, perhaps the inventors should have tried to make the stories fit.

Christian women are embracing dance moves once reserved for strip clubs in a bid that is supposed to bring them closer to God. It’s not about sex, it’s about Jesus!

Does this mean I don’t have to hand over my stack of dollar bills when they start dancing?