Read This Before Knocking

Paul O'Flaherty

Take heed “God Botherers” and knock at  your own risk. Here lies a cranky lodger… God Botherers Imgur.


  1. Timothy Steele December 30, 2011 at 10:36 am - Reply

     Jesus never knocked on anyone’s door and asked them to follow him. I can see it now; Jesus walks over to Peter’s house, (crossing over the stream to get there), and he walks up and knocks on the door and says, “Hey Pete, get your lazy ass up. It’s not the freakin’ sabbath ya know. Can’t be seen with idle hands. Let’s go walk down to the town square and preach some mad shit at all the bitches kickin’ it in the ‘hood. C’mon follow me!”
    No Jesus didn’t door knock and ask for followers. And here endeth the lesson.

    • Dmanbshnaz December 30, 2011 at 10:31 pm - Reply

      You don’t actually know that.  He was AWOL for like 20 years and obviously the bible has its gaps.  He might have door knocked the fuck out of his neighborhood and everyone was too irritated to write it down.

      • Pinurses2 January 15, 2012 at 5:56 pm - Reply

         o plez, the bible…Jesus didn’t write the bible neither did anyone who actually knew him or heard him speak ever.  The bible has been used for eons to try to brainwash and exploit.  Save us the crap.

      • Atheismbyfire April 4, 2012 at 6:31 pm - Reply

        How exactly do you knock on the door of a cave? Or a shack/tent? Why would he knock when he can just walk through walls? He knows your thoughts and what you are doing… So, what is the point? Oh, I know… Him and Pat Robertson are in cahoots to stop you from having all of that sinful delicious gay sex…. Yeah baby….

    • Pastor December 31, 2011 at 12:16 pm - Reply

      Not that I condone the banging-on-doors type evangelism, Jesus did, in fact, approach his first twelve disciples…

      • Cjmk23 December 31, 2011 at 2:48 pm - Reply

        Who cares, the bible is still fake and your religion is worthless. You wasted your life and everyone who follows you has wasted theirs. All religious leaders need to get a job as a greeter at wal mart or as a used car salesman.

        • FieldOfBurch January 6, 2012 at 2:47 am - Reply

          If what you say is true–that there is no God and no Hell for those who don’t accept Christ as their Savior–then I think I have still lived a good life, and it makes no difference in the end.
          If what I am saying is true-the alternatives are much, MUCH worse for those who don’t accept Christ.  I will take the better odds.

          • Batman January 13, 2012 at 12:02 am -

            Oh, old Pascal’s Wager? 

            What about the other thousands of equally likely potential gods?  What if every one of the pantheon has a “worship no god before me” rule, and your image of the deity is off on one little detail so he damns you to hell?  Pascal’s Wager is indefensible for a large number of reasons.  Here’s another interesting spin on it:


          • Pinurses2 January 15, 2012 at 5:58 pm -

            you do that, just leave the rest of us to choose our own odds too. 

    • Koeurdurgarcon January 7, 2012 at 11:35 pm - Reply

      Are you implying the bible can be wrong?

      • Pinurses2 January 15, 2012 at 5:58 pm - Reply

        I’m not implying. 

  2. jdscarface December 30, 2011 at 6:29 pm - Reply

    That’s the link to the Facebook page of a book everyone should read. It’s about how God and Jesus are pissed at how the world turned out, so Jesus goes back to earth to spread the one and only commandment they intended on having: be nice.

    For real. Abandon your religion, stop with your fairy tales, and just be nice. How could the world be a bad place if that’s how everyone lived?

    • Liliblop87 January 5, 2012 at 12:57 pm - Reply

       It is human nature to not be nice, as humans we can only aspire to the divine but our carnal natures will prevent us from ever achieving it because we are not perfect like God is perfect. 1 not nice moment from each person on earth is enough to make this a bad place. You cant be nice 100% of the time let says each person only messes up once in their lifetime which is highly unlikely… that would still leave us with billions of not nice actions all over the place.

      • Psdt January 8, 2012 at 10:29 pm - Reply

        Sure, you can’t be nice 100% of the time because 50% of the time you’re dealing with stupid bullshit put in place by people who think ‘God’ wanted it ‘this’ way. 

  3. BRUTUS December 30, 2011 at 11:15 pm - Reply

    I cordially invited two proselytizers into my home recently. After about ten minutes of enduring me she stormed out crying and he stormed out calling me names that his make- believe friend would likely not approve of.

  4. Rjvjr971 December 31, 2011 at 12:58 am - Reply

    Being raised as a Jehovahs Witness, yet curretly athiest, I have a comment. The crazy thing is, that the bulk of them actually truly believe. They honestly think they are helping you. They may be annoying and misguided, but you have to admire their intentions. The best way to get rid of them is a simple “no thanks”. If you dont answer the door, or if you accept something from them, they will come back. They keep very good records.

    • Jason Faulkner December 31, 2011 at 1:46 pm - Reply

      Why do I have to admire their intentions?

      • Np30488 December 31, 2011 at 3:41 pm - Reply

        b/c they only have love for you

        • Atheismbyfire April 4, 2012 at 6:39 pm - Reply

          I think you misinterpret the severity of the situation… Misconstruing love for fear of death.

      • Rjvjr971 January 2, 2012 at 7:04 am - Reply

        Well, I guess you dont have to. I personally have more respect for a group that tries to convert me because they honestly believe it will help me, than a group that does it to line their pockets, or gain more members for political clout.
         Please dont get me wrong, I do not believe in god, the tooth fairy, or santa. I’m just saying that out of our choices of religious nutjobs, I prefer those that are sincere, peaceful people.

    • Atheismbyfire April 4, 2012 at 6:38 pm - Reply

      How exactly do you respect someone who stays willingly ignorant? Many American men and women died to protect our right to free speech and materials… Most of us willingly ignore it. Millions of people around the world die trying to procure rights such as these… We take it for granted and give a fictitious celestial dictator the glory for something that keeps people willingly ignorant to facts… Sure, why not respect ignorance.

  5. Atwas911 December 31, 2011 at 8:30 am - Reply

    See.. now if we had them locked in concentration camps.. We wouldn’t have to make signs like this.

  6. Carlton December 31, 2011 at 10:44 am - Reply

    He gave man and woman free will to decide for themselves what is right for them.  We believe if you refuse Gods call you will go to hell by your choice.  If you are right you got some extra sleep but if we are right, God will not help you.  By the time you know for sure, faith is not required and it is too late.

    • fleischa December 31, 2011 at 11:08 am - Reply

      Pascal’s Wager? Really?
      What if the people in ancient Greece were right? Zeus can be a jealous god.

      • Liliblop87 January 5, 2012 at 12:49 pm - Reply

        But Zeus can die as his father Cronus and never come back also as his father Cronus. God is a jealous God and he cant be killed, he allowed his only begotten son to die for our sins, but he didn’t stay dead he defeated death. In my book you cant be a God if you can be killed and cease to exist.

        • yanksguy23 June 13, 2013 at 11:52 pm - Reply

          What the Hades are you talking about? Zeus is not dead. I pray to Zeus every day and offer sacrifices monthly. It is because of Zeus that my life is going so well. I have a great job, a nice home, three cars, a wonderful wife and children, and my friends, co-workers, and neighbors like and respect me. Zeus rules, as he has for thousands of years. Unfortunately for you unbelievers your afterlife isn’t going to be so great. You had better get right with Zeus before it is too late.
          By the way, Aphrodite is totally hot. Just saying.

    • guest December 31, 2011 at 11:26 am - Reply

      ignorance sad

    • Fobe December 31, 2011 at 12:05 pm - Reply

      … if you believe that hell exists.

    • Jason Faulkner December 31, 2011 at 1:45 pm - Reply

      Arguing with people who have chosen to suspend logic is like giving medicine to the dead.

    • Ckmk23 December 31, 2011 at 2:52 pm - Reply

      The problem is there is no god….it’s a story, like in a fairytale. 

    • Leueeze January 1, 2012 at 5:27 am - Reply

      that is not giving someone free will, that is using a threat to say ‘do what I say or else’. In this case ‘believe in me or else hell’. (never mind whether you are a good person or anything) You know, like a bullying tyrant would do.

    • Darby January 1, 2012 at 5:32 pm - Reply

      No, he absolutely did *not* give anybody the will to decide what is right. He gave them no understanding of what right and wrong are then told them not to eat the fruit which would give them that understanding. They disobeyed him, which they couldn’t possibly have known was wrong (due to his decision) until after they had done it and then he punished them for doing something which he made sure in advance they couldn’t have known was wrong. It was a completely dishonesty, malicious setup. Try at least gaining a basic understanding of the fairy tales in the bible before commenting on it or you make yourself look ridiculous.

      Plus, Pascal’s wager?!? You should be ashamed of yourself for repeating such an idiotic bit of nonsense which has been thoroughly refuted for hundreds of years.

      • Liliblop87 January 5, 2012 at 12:51 pm - Reply

        Refuted by whom, once you die you die no coming back what is there to refute?

    • Naomi_Ravenmoon January 2, 2012 at 11:59 am - Reply

      Isn’t your stated situation a little like Schrodinger’s Cat?  The real kicker here is….What if *you* are wrong?

      • Arylynn January 31, 2012 at 1:46 am - Reply

        That’s probably one of the best comments on this page….

    • Atheismbyfire April 4, 2012 at 6:55 pm - Reply

      Carlton, how is it that people like you even procreate? It bothers me that you and all your little white trashy kids will be mingling with mine, with your bullshit white pride ignorance. You say God did this-and-that, God created us all equal and then you have some bullshit on your profile to save white people, and white pride. You did nothing, absolutely nothing to earn the color of your skin! So why be so proud of it. Caucasian people like you embarrass the hell out of me! 
      By the way, who is we? Let me guess… You are Southern Baptist. AKA Inbred. 

      • Bryce April 4, 2012 at 7:12 pm - Reply

         Why is God giving all people free choice “White trashy” and “white pride.”  Maybe I don’t understand but can you explain the logical connection to me?

        • Atheismbyfire April 5, 2012 at 9:06 am - Reply

          If you click on Carlton’s picture, the one with the American flag and the one of the losers who wont let a war go… It links you to one of his sites called, “Save White People, White Pride is Great”. Go ahead… Click on it. That’s your people.

          • Bryce April 5, 2012 at 2:25 pm -

             Interesting point.  But I will also point out that the Nazis claimed to be Christians, but most now would acknowledge they had gone off the deep end.  It doesn’t mean all Christians condone that sort of thing.  Just like not all non-Christians are for killing us off.  I see now.
            So no, I wouldn’t claim those people as my own.

          • Atheismbyfire April 9, 2012 at 6:58 am -

            There is a huge difference is some dumb-ass redneck and The National Socialist party… The Nazis claimed divine inspiration for the atrocities committed against the peoples of Europe during and before World War II. I think if you put anyone in an oven, or shoot infants with machine-guns in front of their parents… It is safe to say… They went off the “deep end”. I think that if you read the Bible and believe any of the stories within, you are just the same. The Nazis and their beliefs are a “mass hysteria” type of human phenomena. Just like religion. The Bible is full of crazy murderous rampages in the name of YHWH. So it is safe for us to say, in today’s America, the Bible is way off the deep end also. If you claim Hitler and his crazy followers as “off the deep end”, you must accept Christians are in line with that same way of thought.

          • Bryce Burchfield April 22, 2012 at 11:43 pm -

            (In replay to the post below)
            If you are a true marcro evolutionary atheist, atheismbyfire, you would support global warming and mass genocides.  You do not at all seem like that, which we might agree would be taking it too far –”off the deep end.”
            With everything in life there is a balance.  Some people will always take things way too far.  There is a fair amount of violence in the Bible, but their is also a Savior who is willing to save anyone who calls on His name–including you.  I do condone mass genocide, as I hold that life is sacred–also in Scripture.  I would add “Let he who has not sinned cast the the first stone.”

            Question:  I’ve been wrong before, and so it would not unexpected for me to be wrong  If I am wrong about this whole God and the Bible thing, oh well.
            What if you are wrong?

            Take Care

          • Atheismbyfire April 23, 2012 at 7:15 am -

            (in reply to response below)
            FieldOfBurch,First off, don’t assume anything about myself or any Atheist. We as a group do not and we have not ever in history condoned “mass genocide”. We as Atheists believe this is our one and only life on this Earth and we prefer to live in reality and not within your blind ignorance. Your simplistic belief in an archaic book such as the bible (which was compiled by a bunch of ignorant people with one common goal, control the masses). This supposed truthful book was not allowed to be printed in any other language outside of Latin until 500 years ago… I wonder why? Possibly due to the fact that once you read this book with open eyes and an open mind, you can actually see through its dogmatic, egotistical, murderous rage. 
            You prefer to believe that your god is a jealous one because that is how man is. Jealous and vindictive. All of these things that people like Hitler use to justify his murderous rage. You compile all of this with a book such as the bible and you have all of the ingredients necessary for the holocaust. For some reason you Christians fail to acknowledge this fact and then wonder why, We Atheists, stay so pissed off at religion all the time. It has nothing to do with a fictitious clown in a lake of fire, but more to do with your fictitious being who  seems to let innocent infants be thrown into an oven. Now, you call this freewill. You say that “God” gives us freewill and will not interfere with our mortal decisions… Well, what about when your god hardens the heart of a Pharaoh so he is not to let the Jews out of Egypt? Is your god not interfering with freewill? This is just one instance in your fabricated holy book. 
            You say that this “savior” is willing to save anyone who calls upon his name… Now, you know damn well that is a false statement! What about the genocide in Rwanda? Catholics mass murdering Protestants… I am relatively sure all one million murdered people were calling upon your god and your savior to help them and to save them from his followers! You think? My logic tells me this is true. So, you can’t use the excuse that because Jews didn’t believe in the lunatic Jesus… There is mass genocide, Christian against Christian. Your people, your book! 
            If your god supports and lets things like this go on, but decides to save Paris Hilton from getting another DUI… Pardon my English but FUCK HIM! 
            You also say, what if you are wrong about your bible… Like your faith is the only one outside of Atheism… What if you are wrong about Zues and Thor? Or Buddhism? Or Hinduism? Or one of the many thousands of useless religions? What if you are wrong about religion? Not Atheism… What if Islam is correct? You will be in hell with me… What if Mormons are right? Good thing we have a penis then huh? 

          • FieldOfBurch April 23, 2012 at 11:46 am -

             Can I ask you what type of atheist you are, so that I am not assuming anything about you?

          • Atheismbyfire April 23, 2012 at 12:34 pm -

            I am an Atheist. No gods and no masters. I believe this is our one and only life. One life and our only natural life. I believe that we as humans should love and take care of one another out of love and respect for each other. Not because of fear. Does that answer your question? 
            What type of Christian are you?

          • Atheismbyfire April 23, 2012 at 12:43 pm -

            I am also an Atheist that believes in Evolution by way of Natural Selection.

          • FieldOfBurch April 23, 2012 at 2:23 pm -

            In short, I am a Christ-follower first and foremost.  The best way I can summarize what I believe is stating that I affirm the Apostle’s Creed:
            “I believe in God, the Father Almighty,
                the Maker of heaven and earth,
                and in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord:

            Who was conceived by the Holy Ghost,
                born of the virgin Mary,
                suffered under Pontius Pilate,
                was crucified, dead, and buried;

            He descended into hell. [See Calvin]

            The third day He arose again from the dead;

            He ascended into heaven,
                and sitteth on the right hand of God the Father Almighty;
                from thence he shall come to judge the quick and the dead.

            I believe in the Holy Ghost;    the holy catholic(universal) church;    the communion of saints;    the forgiveness of sins;    the resurrection of the body;
                and the life everlasting.

            I go to a Baptist church but that doesn’t define me as who I am.  I also belief that the church has done things today and in the past and should not have.  I really don’t  think getting into politics is the way Jesus taught us.
            Religions/world views don’t do bad things, people who are imperfect do.  And I am sorry if a church or anyone who claims to be a believer has ever offended you.

          • Atheismbyfire April 23, 2012 at 3:49 pm -

            No church or any other Christian has ever really offended me for being Atheist. I with most Atheists feel people such as yourself are delusional. I would like to know how and why you feel like you do? With all that we know… How do you not see that your religion along with other conflicting theologies poisons everything?
            I have some level of respect for you because you say what you say out loud and you make an attempt to prove it. But… That is as far as my respect goes. Not only am I an Atheist, but I am anti-theist. It is people like you who try and justify your religion through science and you pick and choose stories out of the bible to live by. 
            The fact is this: religion is a way of controlling the masses by way of ignorance. Your people not only commit atrocities on this Earth through the excuse of religion, but you then use it to explain it away. You say your religion is just and a moral code to live by… Where? How? There is not one morally acceptable story in that book by today’s standards. But people like you who blindly follow it want me to turn a blind eye to those Facts, so I can listen to some uneducated man tell me how to translate and digest the bible. Not needed here. I can read, and quite well. I can see right through the issue that the bible is a trumped up book for people to not have sex with their goats over 2,000 years ago. I believe I can learn that one on my own, thanks.
            Then you have Christians who try and say the stories are parables, and those times were different… Well, ok. Fine I accept that. Why do you still feel the need to hear such stories and try to attach the to today’s life?
            You don’t know… No Christian knows. But, one reason is out of tradition and fear of being wrong. The only thing wrong with this sad pathetic excuse for science and philosophy is that people think it is the right path for humans today. Its not. If you use your brain and your logic and your gifts as a freethinking individual who has true freewill, recognize that no one cares for you or loves you like your friends and family. No god needed to establish that fact. It is a survival instinct put in place by ancestors many thousands of years ago.
            The only difference between us then and now is that we have the great ability of communication. Some is not perfect, some is great, but some… Ahem, religion… Needs to shut up and let us be happy while we are here on this Earth.

  7. Jkjljklsjklj December 31, 2011 at 11:34 am - Reply

    This note has a serious tone of asshole to it

    • Kingthamus December 31, 2011 at 12:13 pm - Reply

      So does your comment.

    • Jason Faulkner December 31, 2011 at 1:40 pm - Reply

      So do people who show up at your home uninvited.

    • Arylynn January 31, 2012 at 1:44 am - Reply

      Nah, just funny and eloquently put :P

  8. Vprakash1957 December 31, 2011 at 12:14 pm - Reply

    Dear friend what you said about social justice that is the need of the day is absolutely true. I strongly believe that Jesus preached about equality but truly many of those who say they are Jesus followers including me can not dare to walk in Jesus Way, I don’t know very few persons of that sort may be there. A day on the Earth is not be the same as the day on Saturn. So the seven days of  creation may be understood as the days of God if you agree.

  9. qed December 31, 2011 at 5:07 pm - Reply

    ‘Jesus’ was just a fraud.

    600 years before ‘jesus’, there was a Persian god, subsequently adopted by Romans and thus known to ‘jesus’. This god was called Mithras. Here are some descriptions:

    - Mithras was born on 25 December, through a miraculous virgin birth
    - his birth was marked by a bright star on the sky, which guided Wise Eastern Men who cam to greet him
    - he was known as ‘the savior’, ‘good shepherd’, and ‘the prince of love’
    - he had 12 disciples, with whom he had frequent communions
    - he was a God who had taken human form
    - he died in Easter
    - on the third day he rose from the dead
    - he even had a Chief Priest in Rome’s Vatican Hill
    - his mother was worshipped as Mother of God
    - his followers were babtised

    Sound familiar? As said, this is all documented and happened 600 BC. And, this was known to the copycat fraud also known as ‘jesus’.

    Face it, you jesus-followers. You have been worshipping a fake Rolex.

    • Liliblop87 January 5, 2012 at 12:46 pm - Reply

      Dont know where you got your information, but I looked it up; please post a link so I can find out further about this I am really interested.

      The only things I could find were:

      -Mithras was indeed originally a Persian god later adopted by the Romans.
      - What I found says that he was born out of a rock (where is the virgin at?), and born as a youth holding a dagger in his hand. (Boy I pity any virgin that had to birth that)
      -No mention of any star marking his birth or wise men coming to greet him.
      - Most kings declared they were gods in human form in one way or another specially in ancient world ex. (Egyptian Pharaohs, Naram- Sin (1st Mesopotamian King), Chinese Emperors, Roman Emperors,Japanese Emperors, Natchez rulers, Dalai Lamas,Inca emperors, Ismail 1st of Persia, Nepalese monarchs, heck even George Washington has been worship as a god by certain people… literally)
      -No evidence of exact date he was born, there was a feast held for the sun God on December 25 called the natalis invicti, but the Mithraic religion, cult whatever had no public ceremonies of its own “so maybe they borrowed that big celebration to cover up whatever rituals they performed” quotation part is purely my own idea, rest is research.
      -No evidence of exact date when he died.
      -Only Communion I could find was that he dined with the sun god Sol
      -Rome’s Vatican hill has historically been for sale, so it would not surprise me that  there might have been a chief priest in there. But that is like saying there was a person that was sick or was rich, thats a very general statement.
      -Cant find anything about his mother being worshiped as the mother of a god… but if he had been considered a god that would be expected.
      - Not very many of their traditions survived since their religion was not open to the public, by membership only, members were given a bath and received a mark… being dunked in water does not a baptism make it is just a symbol, if you keep sinning with out true repentance there has been no true baptism.

      So no this doesn’t sound familiar… furthermore I found evidence that there might have been several different cultures which adopted this deity… if you look back to the ancient world when a country united or conquered another many times they would adopt their gods or rename them and mix them with their gods… if such is the case we could be looking at a compilation of different gods that due to wars countries merging and breaking up ended up being the single entity Mithras.

      By the way December 25 is not the date Jesus was born, he was probably born late spring or summer according to historians; but the date was very important to people who were already used to partying at that time so instead of scrapping it and imposing a new holiday, the government and Catholic church decided to use what was already in place.

      You can criticize the Catholic Church and with most stuff I’ll agree but don’t Criticize God, that is not cool… keep your beliefs if they make you happy hold on to your anger and resentment if they keep you warm just remember God gave his only begotten son so that you could be saved and if you believe in him you will have eternal life.

      You’ve just been reached out to, anything you do from here is on you… however if we are right and there is a God that will come back and judge us for our lives… I sure want to be on the Jesus-follower side.

      • Arylynn January 31, 2012 at 1:42 am - Reply

        I actually feel sorry for you. I wish you understood what you just uttered…

      • Atheismbyfire April 4, 2012 at 6:46 pm - Reply

        Um… Perhaps you should get some tea and try to venture outside of Wikipedia… I love you internet over-achievers… You guys are so cute with your stridex coupons and using your moms panty hose as nut rags… god don’t make no trash…

      • rlwemm February 19, 2014 at 6:42 am - Reply

        What do you think you are being saved to?

        According to the Jewish/Christian legend, there was a war in Heaven when one whole third of Heaven’s occupants rebelled against the ruler. There is something very wrong with the management when such a sizeable proportion of people under their jurisdiction rebel. A place where wars happen is not a perfect environment in which to spend an eternity. You could be in for a Hell of a time in Heaven.

        Does free will exist in Heaven? Are the inhabitants just as free and able to choose to behave badly as they were when they were humans on earth? If you sin in Heaven will you be sent to Hell? If others sin in Heaven won’t the rest of the inhabitants be living in virtual Hell?

        If there is no free will in Heaven and the inhabitants mindlessly worship the Jewish/Christian god then are they still human? Are they any different from a de-cerebrate who works entirely on instinct? Would Heaven be full of mind-controlled Stepford Wives?

        I guess if you were mind-controlled you could be made to redefine war in Heaven as “wonderful” rather than horrific. Then you would be no different from the person who is having a good but highly delusional trip on heroine.

        Christianity is a negative religion of fear that preaches the avoidance of pain in an after-life that it cannot prove exists. Have you ever stopped to wonder why there is so little information provided about the alternative positive reward? Could it be because a little thought reveals that it cannot be logically sustained as an real reward. At the very least, you’d be bored after a century or two of monotonous sameness with no risks or challenges or possibility of new knowledge.

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